Relationships change us.

We should let them.

For years, I've listened to people try to explain what happens to love. I think it's stranger, more astonishing, and full of more possibility than we've begun to imagine.

Smiling woman wearing oversized glasses and a purple blouse, posing in front of a decorated bookshelf.

About Andrea

relationship psychologist • author • podcast host

In 2007, I saw Across the Universe in a theater in Times Square. Afterward, I went out onto an empty rooftop terrace, listening to the soundtrack. I felt so full of possibility that I thought I might explode.

I got bigger that night. And it’s the why of everything I say.

I'm a relationship psychologist. I spend my days trying to understand the emotional logic of love: what we're longing for, what we're afraid of, why we get stuck, and what becomes possible when we understand each other.

Somehow I keep editing the magic out of that story, because I'm afraid you'll think I'm some silly girl. But I'm not. I'm right.

Love is magical, and I have the research to prove it.

Close-up portrait of a woman wearing glasses at night with blurred city lights in the background